Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Are you crazy?

Are You Nuts? Why would you want someone elses problems? You should be careful!! What if he's a difficult child? The safety of your girls needs to come first! What if he doesn't fit in? Maybe you should be happy with what you have. Why would you take in some child with so many problems?
Okay, I get it! Some people strongly believe we are crazy and several people do not agree with us. We get it! We get it that not everyone feels like us adopting is a good idea. Is it possible though, for everyone to stop treating me like, we are stupid? Can someone, anyone, please give me some credit? Do you assume for one second that we have not thought this through? That I just woke up one morning and say oh lets go down to the store and pick up another kid on our way home from the park? That we have not considered what a 6 year old child may have gone through, and that he may have some difficulty adapting to a real family? That I have not botherd to pick up a book and read a page? Why does he have to be a "horrible" or "uncontrollable child" just because he was in foster care? Why does the fact that he's not 6 months old make him a throw a way child?
GGGGRRRRRRR
Ok, well let me put some minds at ease... Well not even that. Here is the deal. I want each our friends and family to be a part of this. I want everyone to know our son and love him as much as they do the three daughters we already have! I guess for some that will just not be an easy thing to do.
We have considered about all of these things and more. We know that children who have been in foster care need love and support and time. Even so, we also know these kids need a home, with a mom and dad who love them and can give them time and space and love and space and a happy life with a family. Yes, they may have some difficulties to work through and yes some may take an extra hand in learning to belong. However, I just don't think its too late to save a 6 year old little boy and give him a normal happy life! The girls are happy and excited that they may have a brother soon. None of them cares if he is older or younger than they are and know they will have to share time with us. I have read up on adopting an older child... Book number 4 currently! I have read hours and hours of information online and talked to several people who have adopted. We have read to the girls and talk to them frequently about a new child in the home.
We are not trying to save the world.We are not looking for a pat on the back nor am I looking for a "project" or a trying to "fix" some "poor child," we don't want to "save" a child everyone else has given up on. We want to give a loving child who needs and wants a home and a family just that, A home, a family and a chance at life. I am sick of the people who believe we don't deserve to adopt a child because we "already have been blessed with three and maybe that's all God wanted you to have," I can't imagine that God's intentions were to see 120,000 kids sitting in bedrooms in orphanages across this country waiting for a childless couple to adopt them!
We have considered just about everything and every aspect from the most positive to every what if under the sun! The bottom line for us is this,
We can give a child a home with love and happiness and family that reaches far beyond our front door. There are no guarantees, even when you have a natural child that they will be perfect with no faults, that they will not require help in school or some council or extra support along the way in life. No one can guarantee you a child with not limitations or sorrow. You take on being a parent with the hope that you can love them and show them the best path to take. That you can hold them when they need to cry or cheer for them when they have done well. You become a parent knowing that you don't know it all, but you have family to lean on and will learn and grow as best you can together! You do it knowing you may faulter and that you may screw it up. You do the best you can and pray that ultimately you still have your sanity and some hair left! That your children will be happy and healthy, and you have done some small part to get them there!
If you want to support us in this adventure we welcome your advice and your love and support! I hope that you will be able to stand by us through this and lend a shoulder or an ear. I hope that as time goes by when this is all said and done, and we are sending out Christmas cards with a new face in the picture, that we can all look back and feel like we have grown from this experience.
Thank you to those people who have been nothing but supportive to date! You cannot know how much your thoughts and encouragement have meant to us!

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