Well, I'm all packed for my trip. I need to get the rest of the laundry put away and straighten up my house a bit. I leave in the morning for the airport, man, I hate to fly. It's been quite the week for us with plans for our trip and the death of my cousin. It's been stressful for us to say the least. Iv'e been stressed out with everything that's going on, it seems a bit surreal that it all seems to be coming to the front now.
On Thursday Adam meets with his "new" boss. He will review the offer letter and sign it. That makes it pretty much official. I'm a bit nervous to see what the letter has to say, it will tell us how much money they are offering us to move. But, at the same time it will be nice to know, so we can move ahead with some plans. On Friday, we meet with a realtor who is going to show us a couple of houses. One we are really looking forward to seeing, so that's exciting for us.
The downside of our trip is that due to some miscommunications, we had to buy my ticket separately after Adam had already purchased his. Due to this, we had to book me on another airline. So, I will be getting in an hour before Adam does in Charlotte, but coming back, I will be leaving 7 hours after him. So, Ill be hanging out in the airport most of the day on Sunday. But, it's one little afternoon in the middle of the adventure our family is embarking on.

It's hard to believe that after this week, we have a little more than three weeks to get everything planned, packed and moved.
Life is about to get really busy for us!

Say a little prayer, and keep your fingers crossed that everything runs smoothly this week and weekend and that we get everything we need to get done accomplished!

Charlotte it is

My life feels a bit surreal right now. As I sit writing this I picture a scene devastated by a tornado, debris thrown about and people crying over lost homes and loved ones, then looking down at the ground and seeing a seedling growing in the midst of the chaos. This is what my life feels like at this moment. Most know that our family is dealing with the loss of a loved one this morning, it's tragic and heartbreaking and leaves me at a loss for those of us left behind to pick up the pieces of the lives of the children left with out a father. But in the midst of this stormy day in our lives while I was on the phone hearing the news of our loved one, Adam received a phone call from Charlotte. It seems that we are on our way to Charlotte on Wed. Thursday Adam is to have his "interview" which at this point is more for show. They have his offer letter waiting for him to sign when he arrives. We will be in Charlotte for a few days, until Sat or Sunday I believe to look around at the area and decide on a home. I wish I were more excited, this is the news we've been waiting on for a few weeks. I am sure in a few days, this too shall pass, healing will begin and reality will slap me in the face in the form of a hundred moving boxes! We have three houses we are going to look at around the Charlotte area. Adam will of course sign the offer letter, assuming they have the money part figured out. That is a figure for our move. With everything falling into place, it looks like we are going to be moving on the 21st of Feb. With us loading the moving truck on the 20th (Its a Friday-if you'd like to help load a 26ft moving truck-we'd love to have you) My dad will be flying out to help with the driving part of the move which will be so helpful. We will be spending a few days in Oklahoma so the kids can see everyone there and then we will be heading to Charlotte the next weekend, again dragging my dad with us so he can help unload hehehe... My step dad and mom have volunteered to come down and help unpack and sort-it's an 8 hr drive for them... so things seem to be falling into place!

I guess this proves that even in your grief, life truly does keep moving forward.

The next few weeks are going to be a whirlwind of activity and lets face is chaos! We understand that everyone wants to spend time with us before we leave. I know a couple of people have expressed a desire to do so. We will work our calender around the best we can to allow for that time. If you have a date or something in mind. Please let me know asap. This weekend we are waiting on news of services so I can't make plans yet and next weekend we will be gone.

YAY For good news!

What we know so far

Well yesterday was a whirlwind of phone calls and information. Adam recived a phone call from the recruiter from Siemens who job it is to make sure his resume and abilites matched up with the job he was applying for. We were told Siemens could pay for some but probably not all of the move, wich we were fine with.

From there, Adam recived three phone interviews in about four hours until well into the evening last night. He has talked to every manager at the Charlotte office and seemed to hit it off with them all. The guys in Charlotte seem friendly and pretty eagar to get things moving.

At 645 this morning Adam got a call from Craig the head office guy in the Charlotte area. He wanted to make sure we indeed wanted to go there. Once Adam said yes, well it was pretty much a done deal. Now it's all about formalities, paper work and confirmations that sort of thing. He did tell Adam that he was going to make it all happen and that they would figure out what they needed to do to get our move paid for, so that was great news. Adam will have to go to Charlotte to meet the guys and do a formal interview as required by Siemens and the new office has to inform the old office of their intent to hire him. (more protocall) and then the new office will have to send over an offer letter detailing everything they intend to provide and what Adam's part will be, we sign it and presto chango, we are Carolinans.

I swear all the paper work and protocal gives me flashbacks to our Navy days!

So, nothing is offical on paper yet, but other than that it looks like we are going to be headed to Carolina mid to late Feb. Adam is in California every week until then, so if you have follwed our lives you know that he has once again magically gotten out of packing! (or so he thinks)

I will keep everyone up to date as the information comes in, if yesterday was any indication of the speed in which they are moving, we should know something in the next few days

How do you feel about NC?

I said goodbye to Adam this morning and was pretty sad because this was the start of our weekend marriage. I got up this morning and did what I have been doing for about a month. Look on the Siemens website too see if there were any new postings. I found two, one in Salt lake and one WI. So, I called Adam and said, I could live in those places, although moving to WI in the winter was not at the top of my want to list. He said Okay and would put in for them when he got to his office in Sac.

Fifteen min. later Adam called me back and said, "how do you feel about North Carolina?"
Last week Adam had not heard from anyone, so he called a few of the offices he put in for and left messages for the managers. The guy from North Carolina called him this morning, and they talked for about fifteen min. The guy said Adam sounded like the guy he was looking for, and they wanted a Sr guy who could train the Jr guys. He also said for whatever reason he had not gotten Adams resume, so he didn't even know about him till Adam called. SO, he asked Adam to email him his resume, so he "officially" had it. He said he was going to check into see what he could do about getting us out one time before we made the official decision to look at the area and make sure it's what we want to do. The manager said it was a nice area and that there is a lot of work there for them.

So, this morning Adam is sending off his resume to the guy, he sounds really optimistic about it and said he and the manager seemed to hit it off. Adam told the guy out time frame was Feb. since that's when the lease is up and the guy said that sounds good. SO... it's looking like North Carolina by March?

scratch that...

Okay, I'm actually laughing because that's all I can do at this point! We had settled on a plan, it seemed like a good plan. Then we were hit with some numbers that made us stop in our tracks and go whoa! It's official, we can not afford California. I would have to quit school and go to work and put Jacqueline in day care and bareley brake even. UGH.. I feel like Im on a roller coaster... we are going over a bumb that makes your tummy sink a little...

We are officially back in a holding pattern! But it's okay, I am NOT freeking out yet... Although las vegas is looking more and more inviting these days... Im fine...
Please pray we hear something (good) back from one of the offices soon!!

Love,
US

Catching up...

So, Christmas was wonderful. It was so quiet and we did not even get out of our pj's all day. The kids got to take their time opening gifts and playing with them all. We did not have to be anywhere and no one was rushing, it was sooo nice. The kids got just about everything they wanted and were very happy to get gifts from everyone. I can say with out lying that they enjoyed all the gifts! Adam and I had a nice Christmas and received some very nice including the first white Christmas we've had in almost 10 years. It was a nice touch.

We are now moving on to Makenzie's bday party planning and I just have to say what a scam all of this is! I'm trying to avoid having a party at my house, as we are going to begin packing soon (later in this post) so we have been searching for a place to have her party. The one draw back to having so many good friends, is they all have kids! It's hard to plan a party with 20 kids and not spend $200.00... I have decided party planning places are evil and parents are at their mercy! I have yet to find a place that was not 12-21.00 per child for the 1-2 hour event! For most places, that does not include paper products-this is slang for bring your own-everything!
Makenzie has Okayed bowling, build a bear, pottery painting or chuckee cheese. If you've never had the pleasure... 3 out the 4 of those will instantly induce a migraine for the parents and a melt down for at least 2 of your party guests and will drain your wallet by about 200.00 or so not including the actual gift you are obligated to buy since your mom... YAY Birthday parties! We are leaning toward bowling...Adam hates bowling so it will be fun for all... We will make him the score keeper or child wrangler maybe he can guard the gifts!

About that move... oh my goodness... It's been fun! Since the holidays mean that no one at Siemens works for two weeks, we have not had a chance to hear anything from any of the offices we put in for. We are not sure if this is because no one wants to okay a transfer or if it's because of the holiday. Either way, we have to have an answer for the bosses this week. ugh.. Merry Christmas.. sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo Since we have to give our 30 day notice this month (jan 24th) we had to make an executive decision... We are therefore planning a move to Rocklin Ca in Feb. sigh.. Unless we hear something from another office in the next two weeks.

This move will be for at least a year in the Sacramento Ca area. Not what we wanted! But, at least we won't be separated and the kids will be less stressed.. we hope! At the end of the year, we will again be looking for a place to transfer to. Though next time, we won't be under a dead line and it won't be so stressful. again, we hope. Adam will be working in Ca for the next two months until our move, leaving me to ummm pack. ugh I mean yay... I will be taking a leave of absence from school so that I can concentrate on getting us through this move. I will return to school in the summer and try to catch back up. If you live near us now or near the new place, your being recruited to move furniture.. please and thank you... Adam will be trying to secure our new residence, probably an apartment in the Rocklin area the first part of feb so he won't have to live in a hotel for the month, with the girls and I moving down sometime in feb.

We will of course let everyone know as the time gets closer and we get more details!


Best wishes for a happy new year!

The Roigs~

Merry Christmas

Jacqueline making cookies with Daddy

The first ornaments

It tastes much better on your fingers than on the cookie!

This is Kaleb (he's 19 months and pretty much part of our family his mom and I are best friends and our families spend much of our time together. It took him a while to catch on, but once he figured it out he had fun. till he figured out that little white pile was choc chips. then he spent the rest of the time eating them!

She did not want to get messy!

This is serious work! Don't bother me (isnt she getting so big?)

TADA- arent they beautiful?!?

I can hardley believe that it is nearly Christmas! It has been a whirl wind couple of weeks for us. Christmas is in fact my favorite time of year! I love the way our house looks all decorated and the excuse it gives me to bake yummy stuff. I love having all our friends around and the parties we get to attend. It's all so festive and exciting! I have to say though, the best part is Christmas through the kids. Watching them light up when the decorating is finished and they get to see it all, is so much fun. Hearing them giggle while we decorate cookies and make treats is a blast.

I have been pretty home sick this year and have not been able to shake the feeling of missing out on traditions from when I was younger. Between that and all the stress over Adams job, it had put a real damper on feeling cheery.

But, as Christmas drew near and we got into the traditions our little family has established, the Christmas season just got that snuggly, happy feeling that I look forward too every year. We have some unique traditions at our house for the Holiday some we've taken from other people, and some did not start out with the intentions of them being traditions, they have just happend that way.

1)We put up the tree Thanksgiving night- Its a wonderful feeling that with all we have to be thankful for, we can begin the Christmas season with the friends and family that have celebrated the Thanksgiving holiday with us.

2)When we put up the tree, the girls all get to buy a new ornament for the year. Those ornaments are the first ones on the tree, followed by each of the ones from years past, then the family ornaments. The last ones on the tree are the first ones from last year. When the tree comes down each of the girls ornaments go into their own boxes. The first Christmas after they are married they will get the box of ornaments that they have collected over the years.

3) We make gingerbread houses or people... its a mess and the kids love it. This year we had an extra one, we were baby sitting that night so we had to get Kaleb involved. it was fun till he put his fraosting covered hands in his hair and dyed it green for a while. (we got it out before mom got home)

4) we make handprints of the kids with flour, salt, water bake and paint. The kids like it and it's neat to see how much they have grown, I figure next year will be the last one Makenzie lets us do hers with out holding her down!

5) we feel this tradition is our most important, it's pretty dear to Adam and my hearts that we do it. Neither one of us grew up with much money or had elaborate Christmasas that our girls are fortunate enough to enjoy. We never want our kids to take what they get for granted (although they often do anyway) We have always wanted them to realize that not everyone has what they have. Each year, we find an angel tree and pick out a boy and a girl who are in need. We let the girls pick out the gifts the kids wanted and hand the gifts over to the people collecting the gifts. We do the same thing with a food drive at our grocery store. The kids are old enough now that they understand that not every mommy and daddy can afford to buy gifts for their kids. Although last year, Jacqueline had a hard time giving up the doll she picked out to the Marines (she cried) this year, she was so excited to be buying a gift for a little girl like her who might not get a toy on Christmas, so excited in fact, we had to go pick out another name because, "there still more kids on the tree". It was a really neat thing to see.

A few day's before Chrismtas we drive around and look at lights, although we did notice that there were significantly less lights this year than last year. Lots and lots of empty homes made it kinda sad, but we decided out lights were the coolest!

The kids decided this year they were old enough to wrap gifts... this was a site to see and I wish I had taken picktures of the events. There are presents under the tree we can't touch because, well, they are not well hidden! But the girls thought it was way cool that they got to do it. I'd like to say it saved me time, but if you have kids, you know that's just not the case. But it did make us laugh watching Alexandra trying to wrap a basket shaped gift!

Im adding some pictures of some of the holiday events, I hope they make you smile! Merry Christmas to all of you, from all of us!

"the talk"

Adam has been bouncing back and forth for a few weeks between working in Cali and working in Reno. It's been nuts for us so much so that Alexandra has been acting out. She might not make it if we don't figure it out soon! Anyway, Adam and I have been a tiny bit stressed over finding some where we wanted to live. The criteria has been decent size office so that layoff in the next year would be worry some, but with some smaller surrounding communities as we are not city people, good schools and of course some where we could afford! I know crazy stuff we are way too picky. =-)
Then last Friday, they fired the other guy who has been working for the company for 8 years. Okay they said "laid off" which I know is technically different, unless you are the next one in line, then fired, layed off, down sized, let go... all of those mean the same thing-no job, no money! It made us a little more nervous. We were reassured by Adams supervisor that all was well and we were fine. Well, yesterday Adam went down to California for work, and the manager over the Sacramento office wanted to "talk".

Apparently it went something like... Siemens does not want to continue to pay for Adam to work out of a hotel down there..understandable. It cost way to much money for them to do it that way, okay fine. In three weeks, there will be a meeting between Adam and his bosses, okay that sounds scary! In three weeks, we will need to have a plan of action, okay deep breath.. that's like what-first week of January? Okay... In three weeks, if we don't have a plan* we will have to discuss a move back to California... okay could be worse...

This is the news I got from Adam when he got home at 10 last night. I asked if it was okay if I officially freaked out now... I was told no- he lost!

Okay so the plan* he was referring too is this... We have to with in the next three weeks or so, find an office that is willing to transfer us and have a plan of a date when that will be happening!! If we can't find an office to transfer to by then (three weeks) they want Adam to move back to California to the Sacramento area.

Well, a few side notes, we HATE California!!!! OK breathe.... The schools are terrible up there, its way to crowded and oh yes there was something else, a reason we moved.. what was it? oh yes, we can't afford to live there!!! Adam would get NO raise if we moved back. SO the "PLAN" is, we have to spend the next three weeks looking for a new home! by new home we of course mean new job, new city, new house... in three weeks. If we can't my some miracle pull that off, Adam yes ADAM will have to move back to California, stay with someone, and see the girls and I on Saturdays (when he will want to be sleeping) and Sundays and then leave either Sunday night or super early Monday mornings to go back to California to work. This will
1) leave me as a single mom with a visitor for the weekends
2) Really hard on the kids!!
3) we will have to spend extra money for Adam to help out who ever he's staying with
4) no guarantee he will make it home every weekend, he may have to work, or there could be snow!!!
we actually have friends who think this plan is a great idea.. if I snap he will be the first to go!

So, I am officially worried! Three weeks from now is Makenzies Bday, and the start of my new semester and year of school! It's also the middle of Winter.

We are now grasping at straws. There are a few offices for places we would be Okay living near... Charlotte NC, Normal Ill (we have a very vague idea where it is, for those pulling out there maps, its near Peoria) and there might have been one in Austin, TX (that's out last pick) There is one in Maryland near DC but we did a cost of living analysis and it looks like we would be in a rough spot there unless he got a significant raise.

We have put in for NC and have not heard back but it's only been a week. Normally this week thing is no biggie, but in our time crunch it feels like its been months! Today we are putting in for a couple of other offices like the one in Ill and maybe TX... kind of a see who calls first thing. I have standards don't get me wrong! I have a list of places we won't put in for like, Arizona, las Vegas, Anchorage,NJ... I won't move some where we are miserable just so we don't have to go to Cali and be miserable.

This is all such a big mess, every one ,well most everyone has been supportive, yes, it's wonderful he still has a job! Trust us, we say that everyday!! Yes, this is definitely an adventure!-I'm over the thrill now! Apparently no matter where we move, one of us will have family with in a days drive. I find that sad in a way... we are all so scattered around-at any rate, we even have my best friend who told her husband when we get settled, they were moving! It's nice to know we are loved so much.

I know everyone wants to know how it's going, how we are doing, but to tell you truth we don't have an answer for either one. All of this is happening so fast, it almost does not seem real. Yet on the other hand I have taken so many deep breathes I might hyperventilate soon! At this point I know were moving, I know it's going to be a terrible hectic mess, but I am ready for it, Id much rather be facing endless boxes with a plan... then this perpetual spinning wheel. It's like we have spun the wheel of fortune and are waiting for it to stop.

can't shake the blues

Well, It's been one week since we found out through the grape vine that Siemens was in fact closing the Reno office. I was to say the least angry! I felt it coming, but Adam thought I was just being paranoid. But after some odd questions from people in Sac, Adam called the big boss and it was confirmed (quietly) that yes, we needed to make a plan. Are you kidding? Make a plan? and just who was going to tell us this was coming and when? I can not count the hours I have spent pacing back and forth over the past week trying to wrap my head around all of this. Okay, so no, he has not lost his job... that's great news! YAY for us. Now, the questions begin... we could move back to California, at least thats what the boss in Sac offered Adam. But, we don't want to move back to California, we left for a reason! It's horribly over priced, has a great deal of rising crime where we used to live and the schools are terrible.

So, we know where we don't want to live! Gee that was helpful! so, we drag out Adams laptop and go hunting on the Siemens website for offices looking for Techs. At one point we had a longer list of places we did not want to go then places we did. I know, helpful again! We even concidered Alaska and Canada! Then we came across a listing for Project Manager, for those not familiar PM is a manager or boss who is over 3-4 job sites. They make sure parts are ordered, guys are working, blue prints are right, they attend meetings, the whole thing. It is the job Adam was susposed to do up here once Reno "took off". It's also what he has been doing, with out the title. So, we decided that we should put in his resume to that office in hopes that if we have to move some where, he could at least get a promotion out of it . The kicker? It's in Norcross Ga.

We looked at eachother and said, Whats in Ga? Well, I've done some searching and turns out there is a lot in Ga. But, it's still Ga, it's still far away from anything and anyone that we know.
We have not heard anything yet, as he sent over his resume on Monday and then it was Thanksgiving. SO, we are hoping to hear something back this week. I am hoping that he gets the job in Ga because that means so much for him. However, hearing back from them and them saying yes we want you, probably means us moving right after the first of the year.

Why so fast? Well, our lease is up the end of Feb. So, he has to find a new office, put in for a tranfer, get it approved and get a relocation packet approved, and get us moved all before the end of Feb. Plus, all of the work Adam has up here will be over in Jan. leaving him with no work. At that point they want him to move back to Ca and work from the Sac office. Why not just stay? because the job market in Reno is terrible right now. There are no jobs for what he does. Weve looked, there just arn't any!

We spent much of the week of Thanksgiving trying to make a plan of what we were going to do. SO, it really made getting into Thanksgiving very hard. We had a good time with our friends and family, but it was still just sitting there in the back of my mind like a beacon going off.
We tried to put up the holiday decorations and just can't seem to get into it this year. What we normally do in a day is now three days into it and were still not done.

For us, this is not a regular move... This is not something that has been planned and it's finally here. This was from out in left field, a here ya go, here's this news, figure it out. We were happy, content and just living our merry little life. We have wonderful friends here and the kids are settled in. Now, all of that is just going away practically over night!

We had decided to not tell the kids until we knew for sure what the plans were, but since most of our friends knew and we are going to have to begin making plans, we thought it best they hear it from us and not hear it as an accident. SO, we sat them down and explained to them that we were going to have to move to another state far away because of Adams job. Makenzie got mad, and then cried that she was going to miss everyone in Nevada and California... ugh I hate this!!

We explained that while we were not going to see Adams family as much, maybe we will get to see my family more and she could see all new family... that seemed to help a little... for now.

I thought I was dealing with all of this just fine until yesterday... I walked into my room, looked around and realized how much I hate packing! How much I don't want to pack, how much I am going to miss being in this place. Then I realized how angry I was!

Are you kidding me? I have to move all of this crap again! I have to pack everything and try to get it all into a 26' moving truck... and what if it doesnt all fit? How do you decided what should not go if it doesnt all fit... will I have to buy a new washer and dryer or freezer just cause they won't fit? I love my washer! I need my freezer! What if we don't hear anything from Ga soon? Are we going to put up a map and throw a dart? Are we going to put in transfer request to every office in the country? Am I going to end up in Alaska? What if we do hear back from them and they want Adam there ASAP like when we moved here... Am I going to have to do all of this alone... AGAIN!! Can I fit my friends in my trunk and take them with me? We are going to be moving acoross the country in the middle of winter... who does that?
I'll never be able to find Alexandra another violin teacher she loves as much as this one! Makenzie is going to be mad about this for a while... and at every holiday for the next year... trust me! I went through this when we moved up here.

Yes she will make new friends, but take it from some one who moved around A LOT as a child. It's never as easy as the parents make it sound... and what about me? Making friends as an adult is not that easy! I laid down on my bed yesterday and Adam came and laid down next to me and informed me that if I did not let all of this go, I was going to have a heartattack in a month. I supose he's right, but how do you let this go? It's not all going to get done by it's self. If not me then who?

Im angry! Im sad! Im stressed out! And, Adam is in California working for a few weeks.
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Ill try to keep everyone informed as we become informed... don't be angry if it's last minute! That just might be when we find out too... Keep us in mind if you could when you say your prayers.. and if you could mention Georgia that would be great.

Holidays

Well, Halloween was a great success. The girls looked very cute when they ventured out into the cold October night to trick or treat. They arrived home with 13 yes 13lbs of candy! ugh. The kids went out with Adam and our very close friends and neighbors with their little boy. I will have to post some pictures of the girls but I have not downloaded them off my camera yet!

We are now gearing up for the holidays. Makenzie informed us that she was too old to play with most of her toys. So, I explained to her that she was going to have to come up with some things to tell the family she wants for Christmas. SO, we took the girls to Toys r us to window shop so we could get an idea of what she wanted for Christmas. We made a list and she is excited to get things that aren't for "little kids".

I am excited about the holidays I always look forward to them. Yet, some where inside me they kinda make me sad. Its a bit lonely to never have family around for them. I can't not remember the last time I had anyone from my family spend a holiday with us. SO, I guess that makes it at least 8 years. We spend most holidays with Adams family. Most of the time they are fine, we all have a great time and the kids love it. Though, it still makes me sad that my family misses out on so much of their lives and the girls don't get to share their memories with my family.

I will of course make the best of it and the holidays will no doubt be filled with laughter and fun. I guess with all the joy, the holidays make me a little home sick.

So, Today I felt festive... or fall-ish... I rotisseried a chicken, made an autumn salad and zucchini bread... Does anyone even make zucchini bread anymore? Adam, my dear sheltered husband had never even had such a thing!! How could that be???
I have been making banana bread for the past couple of months on and off and the girls just love, so I decided to make some zucchini bread and see how it played it... They said it was yummy and just like banana bread.
Im going to have to look up some more fall recipes... Im thinking of putting together some recipe books by season. Fall as you well know is my favorite time of year though. If you have a fall-ish recipe out there.... Pass it along!!!

Pictures

Okay!

So, Ive heard it from just about everyone although youd think with the amount of pictures I post on this thing youd get enough of them.... but we went and had the girls pictures taken last night... Im not sure portraits could be any more expensive! But we had some of Kenzie and her cheerleading, some of Alexandra and her Viloin and some of Jacqueline.... then some together. I did get a few for everyone. but do to the cost I did not get huge ones. So... if you don't like the size or want another pose, I will be adding the link where you can go buy them yourself.

They should be available on line in a day or so and have hard copies around the first of November. And If I can ever find some extra time Ill add the most recent pictures online of the girls from their birthdays and stuff.

Money saving....

We decided to take the kids to Disneyland in March again. Its turning into an annual thing! They are looking forward to it so much. For the past couple of years, we have given them the spending money for Disneyland (except for money family has given them to spend) This year, we've made a deal with them. They will be saving their allowance from now until we go. What ever they have saved, they will be able to spend. So, far they have been doing well with making sure they do their chores for their allowance.

Alexandra saves the day!!

The girls have spent the better part of the afternoon and into this evening cleaning up their birthday toys. Trying to get them out of Makenzies room and into their own rooms and toy boxes. This has been quite the struggle with at least 30 or so... Get back in there and clean up the mess threats. I was in the middle of seasoning a chicken for the rotisserie when Jacqueline walks into the kitchen and mumbles something about something.. blah blah blah and under Makenzies desk blah blah blah... so I told her, just crawl under there and get it out then ... Ill admit, I was in a mom zone, of getting a chicken on, making cookies and worrying about the four page paper, I had due tonight on feminism that I had not even begun or knew how I was going to begin. Soooo, I wasn't really listening to what she was saying.
I went back to finish my chicken and walked out of the kitchen and there stood a very jubilant Jacqueline proud as a peacock holding Mrs Butterfly.... I yelled you found Mrs BUTTERFLY!!! She said yes! and was jumping up and down... Then it dawned on me... under Makenzies desk! She said, she was behind a box, behind Makenzies desk the whole time! Turns out, she got Alexandra to crawl under there behind the box and get her out! I knew she kinda loved her sister...
Whew! I guess she won't be needing that butterfly pillow I ordered that I was going to try to convince her was just as good as Mrs Butterfly. So, daddy comes home and he's as excited as she is. She then sat down Mrs Butterfly and said, Butterfly, I was so worried about you! I know how fricken cute right? Well, this whole time she's been sleeping with this velvety elephant Adam gave me a few years back that sleeps on my shelf in my room... She gave him a new gender, he was a she and he was no longer Charlie, but now Eloise. She has carried, he/she around for days now. So, Adam asked her if mommy could have her Eloise back, and she looked at me and said, can I give her back to you when your three? So, it looks like Ive lost Charlie for a while, but we now have Mrs Butterfly and one on the way!

Mrs Butterfly...

Well,
If you know Jacqueline then you no doubt have heard of Mrs Butterfly. He lovey, her comfort, her I cant sleep, eat, go for a ride, be more than 10 feet away from butterfly. Mrs Butterfly is Polly velvet, teal blue, small, butterfly shaped pillow and very well loved. Shes been stitched, snuck through the laundry, rescued and yelled at. Shes been to Oklahoma, Disneyland, hundreds of trips to California and Nevada. Shes been camping all over the place. Healed boo boos, calmed a tearful girl and gave comfort when Adam was away. I can not count the number of times I have been up and down the halls yelling, "butterfly where are you?" and listening to her get a good scolding for being "lost" or "sleeping in the wrong place" . She is the only thing that calms Jacqueline down and makes her feel better when shes sad. She loves her beyond belief. This pillow was given to her when she was an infant. Given by my step sister who I believed purchased it at the dollar store. She sat in a toy chest until about three years ago when for what ever reason Jacqueline attached to her and the friendship was born.

Today, Mrs Butterfly has gone missing. We have searched high and low. Under every couch cushion, every chair, every closet, dresser, desk, blanket, laundry basket and every possible hiding place she could have hidden in. We thought she may have hitched hiked to California in papas suitcases, but alas no, she was not their either.

Amid the tears of child who feels like her world has come crashing down, I had no words to give her. Nothing that would matter, nothing that would take away the tears of her friend who is lost. Those tears usually go away with one hug from Mrs Butterfly. The only thing she could say was "I'm going to miss her!" and " I cant sleep by myself" When I asked her what she wanted to do, she just said, "I don't know ..."

I spent three hours scouring the Internet for this butterfly in hopes of finding one and getting it expressed. But no not even in the land of the Internet where you can buy anything on the planet... no Mrs Butterfly... Is there anything more heartbreaking for a mom then to sit there and listen to your baby cry over a lost lovey and there is nothing you give her or tell or that would make it better.
Sometimes I feel like there is nothing more heartbreaking than being mom with no answers!

My cake

Okay, so here is my cake, its much bigger than it looks. its three cakes wide and two tall. The center (castle) is two round cakes. It took me the better part of the day to get finished. Its half chocolate, half butter pecan cake with cream cheese frosting.

Cake time

Okay,
So I bought the stuff for the cake today. (duh dun duh) Tomorrow I begin baking all the cakes that I am going to need to pull this off. Its going to be a rather large cake. We are expecting about 30 people, give or take. So I have to make it a bit bigger than the picture shows. Jacqueline is very excited. She seems to think this is going to be "so beautiful!"


Im looking forward to it. I hope I can get it to turn out the way Im wanting it too. Any last minute pointers out there?

Ill take pictures when Im done!

just some pictures

This is our friend Nathan when we went camping. Hes trying to teach the girls how to play solataire. He was a great sport!


















This was Adam cooking our grub.... hes a yummy grill guy!























Jacqueline took this picture of Makenzie and Alexandra the other day. It's actually not a bad picture!
This is a picture of my family and my brothers family. We don't get to see them much so we were so happy that we got to visit with them before my brother heads off to Iraq. From left to right; Adam, me, my sister in law Nicole, Jacqueline, my brother Phil, Alexandra ,my nephew Jeremiah, my nephew Josh and Makenzie


This a small cake I threw together for Alexandras actual birthday. We did not want her to think we forgot about it since it was going to be so long before her party. Adam getting ready to help Alexandra cut her cake. He always lets the birthday girl cut the first piece. (oh, and his bald head!)

Her cake all lit up, we had to put the candles in the back, there was no room in the front. And Makenzie in the back ground cha cha chaing the birthday song. I blame Bear in the big blue house for this annoying rendition of the birthday song!

hehehe

oh and some news I forgot...

As you probably know, my hunny hasbeen going well thin through out his hair for a year or so now. So thin in fact you could see through it. So he went to get a hair cut yesterday and came bak-bald.. not a little bald. shaved to the skin bald!! he said he did not want to have patches of hair lol Jacqueline walked into the kitchen and backed up till she realized it was her daddy lol. Its going to take getting used to and I have to buy him a collection of beanies before it snows but he says he loves it. Ill get some pictures up soon!

story of my life....

Well, if you know us, you know that chaos and upheaval seem to fit us well. Life has not been mundane in the almost 10 years Adam and I have been together! So, we could not disappoint.

Adams mom has been living with us for almost 5 months. It was a long rough 5 months trying to adjust to another person in the house who has authority. Keeping a balance of ruling my home and not telling the kids they didn't have to listen to grandma was a tight rope that I have been walking. All of this confused the girls as to who was in charge and it created a back door to them being able to get away with things mom would NEVER be okay with.

With that came some attitude changes in my carbon copy aka Alexandra. Shes very stubborn anyway, but normally quite, soft spoken and mostly agreeable. However, over the past couple of months shes became aggressive with Adam and I and has completely turned off any common sense God surly tried to give her. I have been reassured by every middle child I can think of that this is due to her being a middle kid. Shes become bossy and mean to her little sister at times and seems to need more of my attention. I think this could be a combination of a lot of things. Changes in school, changes at home, and life in general being so busy for us this summer.
Shes still a sweet loving child most of the time and I hope I'm not giving off the impression of one of those kids you see on Nanny 911. No, shes still my kid and therefore kept on a tight leash. I have the reputation I think for being very strict.) We still have tons of fun and shes loved beyond measure. However, between Adams mom being here, Adams changes at his job, my school, their school and life its self. Its just bringing up some reactions in her I need to deal with.

So, we thought we would take some time and reassure her and help her figure out what ever it is that's bothering her so much. Shes always been very sensitive to changes and things going on around her. Therefore, we have decided that we are going to put off (not cancel) our adoption process for a year or two depending on how things progress. We are hoping that giving her some extra time and attention for a while will help. This should also give her time to mature a bit more and learn how to be more vocal... Id love to see her be willing to pick up around the house, but shes still Adams child so I'm not holding my breath there.

Adams mom did move out this last weekend. So, Alexandra now has what was going to be the new boys room. Its pink and brown and has all of her girly breakable dolls and collections in it. Aunt Verna bought her a new bed set (she doesn't know it yet) for her birthday that's brown with pretty pink flowers on it. Shes going to love it. She is the girly one of our bunch.

So, there it is! I have my house back YAY, life is as calm as it gets for us for now. Don't worry birthdays and holidays are around the corner!

okay new cake

Okay,

So, I decided on a different cake. NO, not because the other one scared me! I just like this one better

Girls Birthday

Its that time of year already. My girls are getting so big. Of all the birthday parties we could throw them, it's hard to imagine a better setting than happy little girls surounded by those who love them and want them to have a special day. It's so nice when our friends care enough to support the girls as if they were family since so little of our family can be around for these special moments. The theme has gone back and forth with Jacqueline wanting mickey mouse club house and Alexandra wanting barbie/princess. So Im making a rediculously large castle cake that Lex and I picked out and a small mickey cake for my not so baby girl! I sat down tonight and worked out their invites so I could start planning.

Alexandra

This picture reminds me of the sound of music

Jacqueline

Makenzie Cheerleading 08

As if I need a reason

So,
As if I need a reason to know that I love my family, to know that I wouldn't want to miss a single minute of their lives, to know that with out each other we'd all be lost. I thought, think, that I have cancer. Skin cancer to be precise. One of those terrible kinds of caner that sneaks up on you. You can't feel it (at first) you can barley see it. And unless you know every single inch of your body, you could have it for years and not know it was there. It's a terrible cancer that could kill you before you ever knew you had it.

Why do I think this? I have a couple of moles that look odd to me, there not round, there not flat and smooth and their not one color. Everything, every website Ive read says you should look for. Does it scare me? Beyond words. most skin cancer is treatable with a 5 year life expectancy of about 98% for stages one and two. If you don't know anything about cancers, that's an amazing survival rate! and stages one and two are the early onset, not aggressive yet. stages 3 and 4 are the scariest ones. There are more numbers to cancer of course like the depth of them and if there metastasised or not. But that basic stage tells you your chances!

I have put this off for a while simply because I just did not want to hear bad news. I know it seems stupid, but life is just happier when you don't have bad news hanging over you like a cloud. When every plan you make is attached with a "if". But then we watched this movie the other day called the Bucket list. I almost cried through the whole thing. When it was over, I got out my laptop and began researching. I talked to Adam and we made and appointment. I have never felt sicker in my life. I did not want to walk into that office building today!

(Here is how it went)
OK, well here's the deal as it stands now. I went to my regular doctor today. He kinda glanced at the couple of spots and said, "oh it should be fine". Then said here's what we are searching for and drew a pic and described the very mole I was worried about!
However, he never touched me or got out a light or anything. Adam and I both left feeling really uneasy about what he had to say.
So, I made an appointment with the skin cancer & dermatology institute of Northern Nevada Reno. It's in two weeks on the 25Th. If nothing else, they will map my body as weird as that sounds. Like where all of my moles are and take pics of ones they want to watch, then in a year I go back, and they look over me again to see if any are changed. However, if they find ones that look odd they will biopsy them and go from there. I so badly want to listen to my doctor and think everything is fine. But its just one of those feelings that something isn't quite right with what he said. Something I just can't shake. Maybe it's reassurance of a second opinion, maybe I'm nuts! However, what ever it is, I'd rather be safe than in five years have someone tell me I should have done it sooner.

I told Adam I almost feel nuts, like people are going to think I want to find something. That is not any further from the truth though. I think what I need is a definitive your OK. So I'm not looking over my shoulder. I think the fact that I have been through the cancer treatments before has me terrified that its happening again.

Adam said, it doesn't matter what any one else thinks, if your uneasy get it checked out by as many doctors as it takes.

I knew then that he was not happy with the doctors answer. If he had believed him, he would have told me to just let it go.
So, maybe I'm fine, maybe I'm crazy & paranoid. What ever the answer to that questions is, were going forward with the other appointment this month for a second opinion from someone who deals with this stuff everyday!

Violin

Alexandra and her Violin she loves it so much!

Daddy helping her with her practice.

Taking a break!

Here are some pictures of the girls I thought everyone might enjoy~ It's been a crazy couple of weeks for us. The girls are back in school and doing great. Alexandra proclaims that she's pretty sure she is the only one in her class who listens.
Makenzie's teacher sent me an email telling me what a joy she is in class and that she is loved by all. Jacqueline has taking to being alone quite well and in fact thinks she runs the house now. I think she's right!
Makenzie had to have 4 teeth pulled last week due to some dental issues. She did great with the dental work with no cavities. YAY however, she will probably need braces in a couple of years and they are watching her for gum problems due to her teeth growth. OH JOY! Shes in full swing in cheer leading and walks around the house chanting all the time. It's annoying and I hate it. But she loves it and shes pretty good.
Alexandra is about a month into Violin and you'd never know she hadn't been at it a lot longer. She loves it and wants to practice when ever I can stand to let her. about 20 min an afternoon! Shes learning to read music and is doing quite well with it. She knows all the strings on her violin and takes great pride in taking care of it. She also lost her first tooth over labor day weekend and was so thrilled.

Adam so far does not need surgery on his knee. They have him in physical therapy and a new Doctor. So now it's kinda wait and see if it takes and hope for the best.

So as I said it's been a crazy week or two but we are loving it.

Alexandra first day of school
Makenzie first day of school
Makenzie at her game shes in the front on the left

Jacqueline and Makenzie hanging out

Some day's you just feel like a mom

Most day's you wake up feeling like your a maid, a referee, a chef anything but a mom. The kids are yelling and you have those 4 baskets of laundry to fold. Then there are days like today!I baby sat for a friend for the third day in a row to help her while her regular baby sitter is out of town. He is a great kid but just turned one, so he's busy! Today mom was here to get him around 130. NO Problem! Adam was going to be home by 3 so he could take Alexandra to her violin lesson as I had Makenzie's cheerleading at 630. Well, I realized when my friend picked up her son that it was almost 2 and I had not heard from Adam (not a good sign as he was working 2 hours away!) So, I went into super mom mode also known as fast forward and in our house crazy! I got Makenzie into her cheerleading work out clothes and got her hair into her braids/pony tail for cheerleading. The got the other two changed and their hair done, clean clothes and out the door. One mad dash in the house for Violin we almost forgot and off to Reno-only a 45 min drive... WHEW made it to The Violin lesson 45 min there, left there (late) got stuck in traffic! Some how made it from the other end of Reno to the Park in Fernley in 26 min. (I wouldn't ask too many questions here) Threw one cheer leader out of the car signed her in, got the update gossip and dashed home, dinner in oven and listened to Plug your ears 20 min of "E" practice-that's running the bow across the note of "E" again and again and please God let her hit the note!!! over again.
And in 15 minutes I have to run and get one cheerleader from practice and feed her! Im beat! But as I sit here and write this, I cannot help but feel truly fortunate! We could not have dreamt of the kind of life our children have when we were kids. Neither Adam nor I had parents that could afford violins and cheerleading nor did our parents have the time to chauffeur kids around to their activities.My hope is that my children never have to wish for a dream that they cannot afford. Hopefully, Ill get some pictures and put them up soon of the girls! They are getting sooooo big.

Who knew 7 year olds could be so grown up?!
I was trimming the girls bangs the other day, so I could see their faces again! It was all going rather well until I got to Makenzie, who promptly told me, "I want my hair cut real short!" OMG are you kidding me?? NO way was I going to cut that kids hair! If you know Adam-you know why!
So, I explained to her that she was going to have to speak to her daddy about this, and she better have a great reason.
soooooo when her dad came home, she sat down with him and told him she wanted her hair cut. Her reason- her friend has short hair, his answer NO WAY!
He explained she was her own person and should not change the way she looked because of the way someone else looks. Then he pretty much dismissed her. Well, this was not okay in her book, so she came back!
She said, Daddy, I want my hair cut because it't too long in the back, and I can't brush all of it by myself. -What? are you serious? She came up with a reasonable argument to his dismissal and was not backing down. She said, "I really want it cut short, I want it to look different."
They went back and forth trying to figure out how short, short really was and settled on shoulder length. He said he would think about it-she kissed him and ran out of the room shouting, "and if you say yes Id like to do it tomorrow!"
She left the room leaving me ALONE with Adam and his brooding. However, he didn't really say much except," I guess Ill let her do it."
Making him (music please) "The best dad in the whole world... Thank you, thank you, thank you"
So, yesterday when we woke up Makenzie said, "dad said yes lets go get my hair cut before he changes his mind!" OMG when did she start growing up?
So, we went to the salon, looked through all the books and Makenzie picked out a hair style she liked and got her first ever actual hair cut! (Dad likes it) BTW the stylist was shocked that none of the girls had ever had a hair cut before... lol and no they have not, a trim yes but not an actual hair cut.