Are you crazy?

Are You Nuts? Why would you want someone elses problems? You should be careful!! What if he's a difficult child? The safety of your girls needs to come first! What if he doesn't fit in? Maybe you should be happy with what you have. Why would you take in some child with so many problems?
Okay, I get it! Some people strongly believe we are crazy and several people do not agree with us. We get it! We get it that not everyone feels like us adopting is a good idea. Is it possible though, for everyone to stop treating me like, we are stupid? Can someone, anyone, please give me some credit? Do you assume for one second that we have not thought this through? That I just woke up one morning and say oh lets go down to the store and pick up another kid on our way home from the park? That we have not considered what a 6 year old child may have gone through, and that he may have some difficulty adapting to a real family? That I have not botherd to pick up a book and read a page? Why does he have to be a "horrible" or "uncontrollable child" just because he was in foster care? Why does the fact that he's not 6 months old make him a throw a way child?
GGGGRRRRRRR
Ok, well let me put some minds at ease... Well not even that. Here is the deal. I want each our friends and family to be a part of this. I want everyone to know our son and love him as much as they do the three daughters we already have! I guess for some that will just not be an easy thing to do.
We have considered about all of these things and more. We know that children who have been in foster care need love and support and time. Even so, we also know these kids need a home, with a mom and dad who love them and can give them time and space and love and space and a happy life with a family. Yes, they may have some difficulties to work through and yes some may take an extra hand in learning to belong. However, I just don't think its too late to save a 6 year old little boy and give him a normal happy life! The girls are happy and excited that they may have a brother soon. None of them cares if he is older or younger than they are and know they will have to share time with us. I have read up on adopting an older child... Book number 4 currently! I have read hours and hours of information online and talked to several people who have adopted. We have read to the girls and talk to them frequently about a new child in the home.
We are not trying to save the world.We are not looking for a pat on the back nor am I looking for a "project" or a trying to "fix" some "poor child," we don't want to "save" a child everyone else has given up on. We want to give a loving child who needs and wants a home and a family just that, A home, a family and a chance at life. I am sick of the people who believe we don't deserve to adopt a child because we "already have been blessed with three and maybe that's all God wanted you to have," I can't imagine that God's intentions were to see 120,000 kids sitting in bedrooms in orphanages across this country waiting for a childless couple to adopt them!
We have considered just about everything and every aspect from the most positive to every what if under the sun! The bottom line for us is this,
We can give a child a home with love and happiness and family that reaches far beyond our front door. There are no guarantees, even when you have a natural child that they will be perfect with no faults, that they will not require help in school or some council or extra support along the way in life. No one can guarantee you a child with not limitations or sorrow. You take on being a parent with the hope that you can love them and show them the best path to take. That you can hold them when they need to cry or cheer for them when they have done well. You become a parent knowing that you don't know it all, but you have family to lean on and will learn and grow as best you can together! You do it knowing you may faulter and that you may screw it up. You do the best you can and pray that ultimately you still have your sanity and some hair left! That your children will be happy and healthy, and you have done some small part to get them there!
If you want to support us in this adventure we welcome your advice and your love and support! I hope that you will be able to stand by us through this and lend a shoulder or an ear. I hope that as time goes by when this is all said and done, and we are sending out Christmas cards with a new face in the picture, that we can all look back and feel like we have grown from this experience.
Thank you to those people who have been nothing but supportive to date! You cannot know how much your thoughts and encouragement have meant to us!

The Adoption procedures begin

Well, Last night Adam and I had to attend an adoption orientation meeting. It was about two hours long, and we got to listen to a foster mother explain some of her experiences with us. It was pretty interesting. I believe he and I would have been scared off if we had not already done so much of the research and talked about it so much already. They really focused on the bad things about being a foster parent. I think they were just trying to make sure you were serious and could handle everything. I sometimes feel frustrated that we have to attend the foster stuff, since we don't want to be foster parents. Not really, we want to Adopt a child from foster care. In Nevada though it's all the same process. We have to go to a three day all day training next month out of town. Its 27 hours of training thrown at us in 3 days. Then the real work begins!

So, Jacqueline wanted to watch a movie in their room. I have no idea how to get a movie on in there. You have to do some switching with the VCR and something with the vsmile... I'm not sure, so I asked Alexandra if she could start a movie for her sister. She looked at me and said, "I don't know how to do it, But I will tell Jacqueline" and with that she went off.Jacqueline came in the living room to collect the baby (her baby doll ) and I asked her if she knew how to start the movie she replied "Oh, it's not on yet but I can do it by myself" and she was off. Sure enough about 30 seconds later I heard that THX music from the other room!
SO now it seems I have to ask my 3 year old to teach me how to work there DVD player!

So, I was answering some emails this morning and Jacqueline was sitting on the floor by my "putting her baby to bed" She laid her down, covered her up and told me to "be quite baby was sleeping" She then began to sing to her. She Kept getting stuck on the same part of a song. I then said to her in my whisper, "why don't you sing her you are my sunshine" Her, and I sing that song every night before she goes to bed! She looks at me and says, "I can't that song is not in my IPOD!" She then pushed a "button" on an imaginary box and changed songs to itsy bitsy spider...
She's always good for a chuckle in the morning!

Hi!
OK so it was took longer and was a lot harder to accomplish than I thought it was going to be but...
Today I finally did it. I took my last test. While I don't have that magical little paper in my hands yet (they have to send it to me) I am as of today a High School graduate.

It hit me a lot harder than I thought it was going to also. I thought it was going to be just a cool I did it and that would be that. I am however more proud than I have ever been of myself and I keep fighting back the urge to want to cry! I set out 9 months ago determined to finish what 11 years ago I thought was unimportant-how wrong I was! Even if I never work another day in my life I will never have to look at my kids and be embarrassed that I didn't finish high school. I did all 4 years of high school over this past nine months!


Thanks to everyone who was so encouraging to me and to those who helped me through tough exams or watched the kids so I could study! It truly means a lot to me that so many people were behind me!!

Our Disneyland trip was just amazing! We met many characters and the kids loved every minute of it. Alexanadra was big enough to ride all the rides this year and she did! Even the really scary ones I wouldnt go on. She never complained and was always up for the next one. Makenzie did her best to hang in there although she was a bit more scared this time that she was last time even on the same rides. Jacqueline was not as thrilled with the rides she in fact cried through most of them. There were a few that she liked and some she tolorated. She loved the shows though so that was some relief to her. She also dugg the food. They do have some pretty yummy food there. It was so cool that Verna got to come with us. I miss having some of my family around and it was so nice to be able to share some of what the kids did and enjoyed with some one who shares blood with me! I hope we can all do it again sometime. We are of course going to try to do it again in a couple of years I imagine at the same time of year. The kids saved up money for months for the trip and really did get some cool souvoniers this time around.


I love to watch Disneyland through the girls I can't imagine it would be nearly as much fun with out them there gasping for breath or sqealing with delight when ever there favorite person just strolls by and when they get off of a really cool ride and want to do it again... and again..and again lol I hope that next time Jacqueline will be into it and we can all have the same thrilling time!!

one week and counting...

The kids are excited! Im excited and Adam can barley stand him self! Why? we have one more week till our Disneyland trip!! WHOOOOO HOOOOOO!!! YAY!!

Loved

Well, When things happen in your life good or bad. It brings to light the people who seem to really care. The people who matter the most to you or perhaps it the people you matter most too. The past week has been just been hard plain and simple, HARD.

I have been trying to keep up with family stuff that is a job all on its own. But last week I hurt my back. The how is still a mystery but the pain was pretty intense and nearly brought me to tears. I have a pretty good tolerance for pain but this was just too much. I finally broke down and went to the Dr. He told me that I had in fact strained a muscle near my spine. That swelling was pushing on a nerve. The pain that shot threw my back any time I moved literally- took my breath away. I was put on bed or at least couch-rest for most of last week. with a moist heat pad 4 times a day and some pretty strong muscle relaxers every six hours for almost a week. Adam tried very hard to keep things together around the house and take care of me. I was also dealing with some other things during the same time. trying to get some ends tied to together for our trip from my area on the couch. I was worried I would not be better for our vacation which we have been planning for 6 months.
Then this wonderful man I am so privileged to be spending my life with brought home a small box of my favorite chocolates-See's candies truffles. Then at the bottom of the bad was a small box inside a beautiful, simple necklace with a small diamond on a circle.
There's no birthday, no holiday he wasn't in trouble... just wanted to make my week better. it was a gift he said "because it's Tuesday"
That's when I was reminded that no matter how bad the week had gone, what I was going through or the fact that I could barley brush my hair let alone put on makeup-I am loved very much.

I love you too Adam!!


-:¦:-•:*'""*:•.-:¦:-•*Dana*•-:¦:-•:*'""*:•.-:¦:-

This week

Well Makenzie entered her science project at school it was on levers. Last night was the awards and open to the public thing. She didnt win anything but it was a great experience for her. She was more upset that her class didnt win. (they do a class project and they came in second) She and Adam had a lot of fun doing the project so I think she might do one next year as well.

Alexandra got her glasses in the other day. She looks very cute in them I need to get a pic of her in them. They are a dark pink and so tiny! She loves them and wants to wear them all the time even though she only needs to wear them for reading. one little boy in her class didnt like them but we dont listen much to him they are not friends anyway lol.

I have not been feeling well the past couple of days I am pretty sure I might have a kidney infection. I have been trying to take it easy and flush out my kidneys and avoid that hated trip to the DR. Im not sure its going to work for me though. ADam has been great helping out around the house and with the kids. Its so nice how he steps up and always helps when I need it. He never complains about helping me out and when I truly need help theres no house work he wont do. from the dishes to bathes to laundry he turns into a real MR mom when I need him . I just love him for that!

We also got our Disney package in the mail. YAY 2 weeks and 2 days left!

SO, having kids is in my opinion incredibly rewarding and full of adventure. You love them with ridiculous amounts of love and cherish things that most people would look at as insignificant. like the fact that today Makenzie was simply confused as to why they were giving away mattresses on TV just because it was Presidents day. She in fact thought this was all wrong as we always have to pay for everything. It took some time for us to convince her that in fact it was just a commercial designed to get people to come and shop at there store. reading this story you might not see the humor in it as we did but you have to understand that she is seven and that the understanding of money and items was pretty advanced for her. It was something we thought was special. It's just one of those things you have to either know her or have kids to understand the irony of what kids do. I love my kids with out question and would do almost anything for them. They make me laugh almost every day and we have lots of fun together.
Then there are the days.... those days when you want to scream and lock your self in your room and wish the day would just end. Days like today when the kids have been picking at each other just enough to make each other whine and cry and annoy me.... I dealt with most of it just fine. letting them battle it out while going about my chores and ignoring most of it.
Finally it was time for them to head off to bed so that tomorrow they can go back to school. I thought at this moment they were on there way to bed and I could relax with my favorite show.
THEN IT HAPPENED; The calm and quiet of our house was broken by my GASP and screaming for Alexandra... she walked into my bathroom where I was standing in the middle of what used to be the hair on her head!! Yes my beautiful baby with hair past her waist who's NEVER had her hair cut... had taken a chunk out of her bangs and and about 5 inches in length of the side of her hair by her ear!!!! WHHHHHHHYYYYYY I asked almost in tears.. the answer? it was in her ear! ARE YOU KIDDING?????? WWWWHHHHYYYY do they do crap like this? she could have cut her ear off! or poked her eye out!
You may not see this as a big deal... its only hair? this is hair that I have babied since she was born, the hair I spend an hour combing every night and then in the morning! Hair that we've been growing out for 5 years. its so beautiful. and its just missing this chunk. If I were to cut it to blend we would have to cut about 7 inches off the back to even it all out. She was crying at the thought of this.Maybe you can understand this... maybe you have to have Little girls to understand this! it took some handy scissor work to try to fix her bangs some of which were cut to almost the scalp. after 20 min of looking at her hair and listening to her cry over it we decided to just let it go... it's going to look funny for a while and we are just going to have to let it grow out and then trim it up to match later on...

I took a deep breath told her she couldn't EVER touch my scissors again and sent her to bed!

OK, can we be done with sick kids for now? We had Miss Makenzie with a double ear infection! They are actually talking about putting tubes in her ears when we get back from vacation.
Then 2 days after she was sick Alexandra got the flu... not just a little flu, but the flu thats been killing people off out here! So that left me and her camped out in the living room with me waking up every 20 min to make sure she was breathing. It was like having a new born all over again.
Then theres Jacqueline who I am pretty sure had croup. her harsh seal caughing made my throat sore. At least her runny/stuffy nose is ending.

Come on Vacation!

Valentines Day

Well, I'm not a big fan. I don't like the idea of spending a lot of money for flowers and candy. I also hate that feeling of people watching me open presents. I love the idea that Adam loves me and wants to show me that. He does a pretty good job of that most days of the year. He loves today. Loves to try to surprise me and make me smile. This morning he did that. It was still dark and I was not quite awake when he handed me a very soft cuddly teddy bear who had a heart on his tummy and that burgundy box that helzburg sends out those lovely diamonds in! The necklace is just beautiful two heats intertwined and wrapped with diamonds. Hard to describe maybe Ill get a picture on here. And the bear plays "when you wish upon a star" well that was just about enough to make me cry! It does have me wondering whats in that big box on the table wrapped in mickey ear paper specially delivered from the Disney store that I am not allowed to touch till he gets home?!?
Im making him his favorite dinner =0)

Well we've had a very busy year this year. It's been full of change and
some excitment and quite a few tears. It's been busy and complicated and I can't
quite believe that its both over and that we made it out in one peice! We moved
to another state, which required school changes. Adam left with work for 6
months and was in out of our lives half the year. The girls and I went on
several short vacations and I found out that Im a stonger mother and person than
I thought. Adam and I found a part of our marriage that we didnt know was
missing and today we are at our happiest and life seems to be right were we like
it. Busy, a bit chaotic, fun and moving forward!